From BMT Newsletter May1994 Issue # 23 - Breast Cancer Reprinted by NYSERNet with Permission from BMT Newsletter
In 1990 I was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent a mastectomy, followed by chemotherapy and a second mastectomy to remove the other breast. Two years later the cancer metastasized to my sternum and an autologous BMT was recommended. I entered the hospital in August 1992 and spent 27 days in the isolation room, and an additional month near the hospital for radiation therapy.
The following April, my cancer recurred. There were several metastatic tumors in my back and head. After completing a two week hospital stay which included testing for every medical problem known to man, I began chemotherapy for the fourth time.
I had returned to my job as a special education teacher in January 1993, and to coaching the local girl's high school golf team. After the recurrence I continued teaching, and accompanied the golf team to the state tournament. But after 20 years in special education it was time for a change. Since my husband planned to retire from the Indian Health Service in January 1994, I decided to take a disability retirement from the school so we could travel and golf at our leisure.
In November 1994 I had a reaction to one of my chemotherapy drugs and a pain medication. I was again hospitalized and tests were performed to make sure the cancer had not spread to any organs. A Hickman catheter was inserted and I returned home to continue chemotherapy on a 2 week on, 2 week off cycle.
The first two days after I returned home were the lowest point in my living with cancer. I was weak from the hospitalization and couldn't return to the same routine of sewing, golfing and just plain ambulating. I finally admitted to myself that I felt scared and mad about the whole situation, but decided that sitting around moping was not the way to spend the rest of my life.
My friends and family assured me that it made no difference to them that I had a dowager's hump which, at the age of 45, didn't appeal to me. They said it was okay to sit down when my muscles could no longer support my curved spine, and assured me that they would sit with me.
So I walk a little funny now and I sit a little more often than I used to. I will have to ride in a golf cart rather than walk and carry my golf clubs, and I probably won't be the City Ladies Golf Champion again. But I'm still able to enjoy today's snow, to sew, and to get excited about taking a golf vacation next week. I'm looking forward to my niece's college graduation and another 20 years of married life.
Granted, chances for long-term survival following an autologous BMT are not great if you have metastatic breast cancer, but I could have been in California during the earthquake, too. I don't consider my ABMT a failure, just a setback.
Life is ours to enjoy or despair of. I prefer to enjoy and not concentrate on what inconveniences may occur. There is always hope if we want to take advantage of it.
This document was created by NYSERNet, Inc. through a grant funded by the New York State Science and Technology Foundation as part of the Breast Cancer Infomation Clearinghouse.